I think that Miss Bella has finally turned the corner at preschool...she has gone two and a half weeks now without tears (fingers crossed & knocking on wood).
On September 16th, a Tuesday, I became very worried about how the rest of the year would play out. She had many tears that morning when I dropped her off and when I went to pick her up the same thing...this had been going on for a few weeks but this day she was worse. As I walked in she came rushing for me and accidentally knocked over her juice in attempt to get to me in a hurry to get out of there. I started to clean it up and was talking with the teacher about my frustration because I wanted this to be a great experience for her but it was not going that direction at all. I also expressed Bella's concern that her friends didn't really want to play with her. The teacher shot back at me (yes shot), "Well they try but she just cries too much that they don't want to be around her! They try and comfort her but she wants nothing of it."...there was more to the conversation but this is the part that sticks out in my head. She then turns to holler at two boys that were playing around. At this point I'm a little perturbed at how she is reacting to me and the boys and had a bit of a red flag go up. I then told myself that she's probably having a rough day, her hubby's going in for surgery in a few days, we all have stressful days, blah, blah, blah.
The next day (Wednesday) at the older kids school, another mother (who's son also goes to the same preschool, same days , different teacher) asks how Bella is doing and which teacher she had again. I told her it's not going well and the teacher's name. At this point Bella turns to look at the mom and says, "She's EVIL!". Well that was a shock to me and that was the first time she had made that comment (another little flag).
Thursday morning rolls around and it's preschool time again and the tears, the "I don't want go", and the struggle begin. Don and I both brought her to school (we were still in the trying everything & anything to make it better stage)and on the way in I say, "Bella, I forgot to tell you but you will have a different teacher today...a substitute because Mrs. P has to be with her husband who's having his surgery today." I a little worried that she may freak out even more at this, but oh no, she looks up at me smiles and starts to skip (another little flag). She walks into the classroom, sits down & no tears. I pick her up three hours later and she runs to me, all smiles, and exclaims, "I didn't cry at all today mommy!". HMMM!?!?
Later that day she tells the kids all about her great day, her "new" teacher, and how she loves her. We all reminded her that she was only her teacher for the day and that her regular teacher would be back...she wasn't having it. So that evening I decided that it would be a great idea to get all the kids involved in a little "psych" project (I prepped the older ones before going into it): At dinner time I asked each child to tell us their favorite thing about their teacher. We got to Bella and her 1st comment was "she's evil" but then she was able to come up with, 'she reads us stories'. When went around the table again with the same question and then I asked for them to point out one negative/something that they didn't care for about their teacher. Nico of course says that there isn't anything because she's awesome....under my breath to him "come up with something, work with me here". So we finish the project and I'm praying that something stuck with her out of that.
Fast forward to Tuesday, 9/23 and she is upset again but not as bad as the previous week. I have a play date planned with one of her classmates after school so I use this as leverage with her, and I'm also hoping at this point if she creates a bond with someone outside of school that it may help during school. After I dropped her off I thought it would be a good idea to express my concern with the director especially after Bella's teacher says to me, "the sub said she did great with her, I sure hoe it's not me?". I chatted with the director, spied on Bella (she seemed to be having a better day then previous ones), chatted with the teacher about what we should do and then left feeling great about my decision.
Ever since that day school has been great! I'm sure it was a culmination of all the steps that were taken that helped to make this change. All I have to say is I'm glad she is enjoying preschool now because I was VERY stressed out over it all...no mother wants to see her child so upset about anything and I felt like I was DRAGGING her in their each time to a pack of hungry wolves (at least that's what her emotions portrayed to me).
Sorry this is so long (heck I didn't even put everything in) but I needed to get all documented.
